


The Inquiry

by TheEternalNewb



Category: Parahumans Series - Wildbow
Genre: Assault is an abusive piece of shit, Assault is dead, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:08:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23771335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEternalNewb/pseuds/TheEternalNewb
Summary: A formal inquiry is conducted into a possible breach of the Endbringer Truce
Comments: 5
Kudos: 33





	The Inquiry

Battery walked into the room, led by the bailiff. She flexed her hands in the cuffs that had been put on her in the recovery tent. The cuffs were tinker made, and were honestly fairly comfortable other than the fact that they were designed to resist the use of her powers and in fact resist her building a charge. There was a spot in the back of her brain that itched at this. Battery sat down in the indicated seat in front of the panel.

“I’d like to call this formal inquiry into the events leading to the death of Protectorate Hero known as Assault and accusations of a breach of the Endbringer Truce to order. Protectorate Hero Battery, you have been accused of deliberately causing the death of your partner, Assault, and we find the accusation credible enough to ask for your defense in this.”

“If I’ve been accused, I’d like to face my accuser,” Battery said, calmly, keeping the advice she’d been offered in mind.

“This is not a criminal prosecution. This is a formal inquiry. You have no right to face your accusers here.”

“You already have my official statement, that Assault nobly volunteered to sacrifice his life to allow several of the defenders to escape Behemoth’s kill aura. Can I know who made the accusation, and what basis it was made under?”

“The exact identity is classified,” one of the seated officials said, shuffling some papers, “but one of Madcap’s old associates raised the concerns. He stated that Madcap had informed him when they were out drinking last week that he only joined to see you dead or miserable as revenge for ruining his career, and that sacrificing his life to save yours would be the last thing he’d do.”

“Well,” Battery said, “that can’t be correct. The terms of his parole specifically forbade him from associating with any villains at all, especially ones he met as Madcap. Are you sure I can’t confront the source of such an obvious lie?”

“Dammit woman, I have here your reports from ten weeks ago that you believed he was breaking his parole in exactly this manner. It was looked into and the inquiry board accepted his defense that he was explaining the benefits of joining the Protectorate to his old contacts. Don’t pretend this is news to you.”

Bingo, Battery thought. “Why, are you speaking of the five different reports over the course of two weeks complete with surveillance photographs of a probationary Protectorate member violating his parole that I turned in to the Director along with my request for a transfer to another city? I was informed, when Assault was transferred along with me, that I must have been mistaken and those pictures were of someone else. My being correct about his parole violation is entirely news to me. So, a villain he was explaining the benefits of joining the Protectorate to says this behavior doesn't fit his motives because he wanted revenge on me for thwarting his villainy and wouldn’t have sacrificed his life for mine. What’s my motivation in this fantasy?”

“Presumably the same,” muttered one of the officials, going silent at a sharp look from her right.

“I have here,” said another official, “a series of thirty sexual harassment complaints from you about Assault, two or three a week, every week. It’s not unbelievable that-”

“Excuse me,” Battery interrupted, “that can’t be correct because Protectorate regulations state that any protectorate member with more than ten misconduct complaints against them is to be relocated to another office while the complaints are investigated. If you have thirty complaints from me alone, then there is no reason he should have been assigned as my partner for every single patrol during that time.”

“We know you did it,” came the angry response. “We know you killed him because you didn’t like being forced to work with the man. You couldn’t just shut up and put up with him so we could have more heroes. Now you’ve robbed us of not only him but of every villain who might have joined us for his example.”

“Are you saying, Director Stone,” Battery replied slowly, “that it is the position of this inquiry board that Assault was a villain who was sexually harassing me as revenge for stopping him from committing criminal deeds, that everyone in a position of authority was shielding him from my complaints about his malicious nature, and I should have allowed him to continue worsening the work environment in the Protectorate? That’d be a terrible thing for the public to hear. Now, I have a recording device in my cuffs.” Battery tilted her arms so that the officials could see the display of controls including the blinking RECORD on the side. “Try anything and it gets sent to some very interested journalists. I personally don’t subscribe to your theory. I think that everyone who told me I was wrong about him was absolutely correct, that he indeed turned over a new leaf, and that he died saving my life and the lives of those around us. He’s a success story, because the alternative is worse. What do you think?”

{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}

Battery ran from the building to where Armsmaster waited at the curb. “Excellent. Right on time. I confirmed ten minutes ago that they had determined the accuracy of your words regarding my design.”

“Thank you sir. I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“Don’t thank me. It’s much more efficient to not have certain kinds of issues interfering with team dynamics, and now I have a success story to hold up, about how well probationary heroes work. It will greatly improve my reputation.”

Battery smiled. “Still, thank you, sir.”

Armsmaster paused. “Any time. Just ask.” Then, he sped off. He had a city to save, and discussing things any longer with his subordinate would be an inefficient use of his time. Plus it made him look cool as hell.

**Author's Note:**

> Things that are canon in Battery’s interlude:  
> Madcap made a career of releasing mass murderers from ordinary prisons and included birdcage transports in his services.  
> Madcap had no strong ideological opposition to the birdcage.  
> Battery decided to become a hero specifically because Madcap was helping villains evade justice as decided by the court systems.  
> Battery felt so strongly about bringing Madcap to justice that she went into favor debt to get a power strong enough to stop him, rather than settling for a weaker power she could afford.  
> Battery was a minor when she was hunting Madcap.  
> Ethan openly admitted to being a sadist who, as one of his “concessions” for being a hero wanted to annoy Battery by being stuck on her team.  
> He agreed to stop calling Battery “puppy”, an insulting nickname she hated, in exchange for being called Assault, specifically to pervert the meaning of her own name and send a message that they were together.  
> Legend guilted Battery into accepting these items which she considered unreasonable, and she agreed only on the condition that Legend put his name on the decision  
> Battery doesn’t date for two years after being stuck with Ethan as her shadow.  
> Ethan is completely aware of everything Battery does in her civilian life, enough that he feels confident in stating that she hasn’t been on a single date.  
> Miss Militia is aware of her situation and feels sorry for her but is unable to help.  
> Battery calls what Assault is doing harassment.  
> In an effort to make him stop, Battery sets a condition she does not believe he will fulfill- entertain children at an outreach event -as the terms for going on a date.  
> He fulfills this condition specifically to annoy her, by reading gruesome poetry to children.  
> Battery’s three favors were to join the Protectorate, meet a Cauldron client in her Battery uniform, and ~~die~~ help Siberian and Shatterbird escape.
> 
> Things that people remember about Battery’s interlude:  
> Ethan calls Battery “puppy”  
> They marry  
> Ethan hates the burdcage


End file.
